My First Trimester or Why Does it Feel Like Someone is Rearranging My Organs?

Because someone is literally rearranging your organs, Lauren. That’s literally what happens in pregnancy. Duh.

Now that I am inching closer and closer to the finish line, I thought I’d share some First Trimester thoughts. Before going into pregnancy, I’ve seen some of my closest friends get pregnant and I’m forever thankful to them for being real. There’s so much about pregnancy that people don’t discuss and I can’t figure out if it was simply the patriarchy (we don’t talk about “personal female things”) or if it’s truly because every pregnancy is so damn different.

The more people I’ve talked to, blogs I’ve read, and TikToks I’ve watched has proven to me that no one has the same pregnancy as someone else (and rarely do they even have the same pregnancy twice). There are symptoms that I’ve read about that supposedly happen in the first trimester that I never experienced and some I had to google because it seemed like it was just me. So here’s my journey.

1. “Morning” Sickness is a LIE

If you’re lucky enough to only feel sick in the morning, take it as a blessing. In fact, I’ve heard of some women who didn’t experience any sort of nausea at all (everyone that I have personally talked to who has said this did end up having a boy). But for me? About week 6.5 to week 10.5, I wanted to rip my stomach out and deep clean it so that maybe I would stop feeling nauseous. The worst part was that I felt like if I could simply throw up, I would feel better. Alas, the vomit never came. I just stayed in a perpetual state of believing that all food wanted to kill me. I was never hungry. The first few days of this, I maybe ate 500 calories in a day – which I know is terrible and I was trying SO HARD to simply eat food. It felt like an impossible task. Eventually, I could feel when I felt the least nauseous and I would quickly eat something. My staples were toasted sourdough toast with butter or a Greek yogurt bowl (with granola, fresh fruit, peanut butter, honey, and chia seeds — eating this meant I was having a good day). I basically lived off those two things during that time. As someone who has struggled with their relationship with food, this was really hard. Like… really fucking hard. I still loved cooking and would cook with the hope that I could eat more than 2-3 bites. It was a rough time being around friends too because I didn’t want to tell anyone about the pregnancy yet but I also felt so sick. I would constantly say, “oh man, I had a REALLY big breakfast/lunch” or “ugh, I ate something at breakfast/lunch and it did not sit well” (this is a iffy play because people like to assume pregnancy whenever a woman has a tummy ache – I am someone who has a lot of sensitive stomach issues already, so I am lucky that this didn’t really play a factor). I pretty much stuck like glue to my husband so that when I would get to my 3rd bite and immediately push my plate away, he’d know why.

2. “Food Aversions” came out in full force

Before I knew I was pregnant, I was having a rough time with meat. I’m not a huge meat eater anyway (not a vegetarian, by any stretch) but this was different. At my work, we get catered lunches for the three days we’re required in office (it’s supposed to be an “incentive” to come in). This always includes meat, which I would look at and simply get the ick. This was very early on, I was only about 3 weeks pregnant when it started so I was confused as to why I was suddenly not buddies with meats. I spent a lot of that time with rice and veggies at work. When I’d go out to eat, it would be a vegetarian dish by default. This still carries into my second trimester. I’m a little better but I very easily get the ick with meat (ya know, when chicken just tastes too much like chicken?) and want everything suuuuuuuper cooked (no pink for me!). When it comes to lamb, I can’t even think about eating it (I’m Greek so I think this is illegal). That seems to be my only real aversion. Sometimes I’ll just get the ick mid bite with something completely random and there goes my appetite. Cravings aren’t really a thing for me (yet?) – beyond the normal “I want Taco Bell” or “I could use a good bowl of pho” (two things I could probably eat everyday and never get tired of it). I do gravitate towards “healthier” (I hate that word) foods, but that’s me in general. Like I said, I have a sensitive tummy. Too much oil/fat really ruins my day.

Along with food aversions, my smell was ramped up. There were a few things I couldn’t handle anymore (truffle, corned beef hash) and I’d smell things that weren’t there (supposedly – maybe my husband can’t smell). There were many days when I would straight up smell vinegar or bread baking but he couldn’t. The phantom smells are gone but this second trimester has held onto my super smell! I don’t even want to talk about other people’s B.O……

3. I became a nap girl

I am not a nap person. I’d rather just go to bed early. There’s no rallying for me. Give me a hot cup of tea and a book. I’ll be out in 5 minutes. Towards the beginning, I wasn’t tired. I had heard so much about how exhausting the first trimester is. It makes sense. This is all something your body isn’t used to (even if you’ve been pregnant before) and you’re literally growing a human being. But I didn’t feel it.

Until I did.

Around 10 weeks, I immediately needed a nap everyday. If I didn’t nap, I was like a cranky toddler and I’d put myself to bed at 7pm. My brain would stop functioning, I’d get grumpy, and getting up from a sitting position was the most difficult task in the world. When we went to Portland/Seattle, I needed at least 3 hours between lunch/dinner for a nap and/or decompression. I even napped in the car after the donut tour (where we walked around 7 miles). The exhaustion isn’t as bad in this second trimester but I heard it’ll be back! I cannot wait.

4. Holy calf cramps, Batman

Full disclosure – I got night calf cramps pre-pregnancy already (don’t talk to me about potassium because unless everyone else in the world is eating like 25 bananas a day, there really has to be more to this). I would wake up from a dead sleep with a calf cramp maybe 4 times a year – if even that many. They suck so much.

During my pregnancy, I get it at least once a week and when I do get it, it’s about 3 to 5 times a night.

So magical 🙂

I have done everything. I’ve added cream of tarter (potassium!) to my morning smoothies where I also add bananas (potassium!). I stretch before bed. I walk a lot. I give myself time to wind down before bed. I do everything and still get these cramps sent straight from hell. I will never complain about those 4x a year ever again.

5. Things were moving around

I felt shit happening. I don’t know how to describe it other than like that. Shit was moving around in my abdominal area. I know that my baby was much too small for me to feel actual movement so I believe those things I felt were my organs shifting to make space for a baby to grow. It was wild feeling things going on inside.

6. No period/spotting

I’ve heard that some women experience a light period, even while pregnant, which sounds incredibly unfair. A long time ago, I had gotten an IUD that was supposedly supposed to stop my period completely. I believe the statistic I was told was that around 96% of women stop their period while they have this IUD in them. I was that 4% that didn’t. In fact, nothing changed. It didn’t slow my flow or make the cramping less intense. Due to this, I was convinced that I would be one of the women who still got a light period during the entire pregnancy – thankfully, I am not.

7. My weird ass dreams got weirder – and more frequent

I have pretty vivid and weird dreams as a non-pregnant woman. I would have a weird dream – that I 100% remembered upon waking up – about once a week. I would roll over and tell my husband (especially if that asshole, Dream Jacob, showed up) and he’d stare at me like I was going insane. During the first trimester, this was practically every single night. My mind was like a wild maze of every single movie/book/show/story I’ve ever heard of and would throw the most random characters at me. I had the weirdest, most impossible adventures and I think this contributed to me needing naps because my nighttime slumber was too crazy for my poor little brain.

8. My boobs HURT

I felt like both my boobs were just put through intense probing almost every single day. They just… ached all the time. Thankfully, in this second trimester, I haven’t had this issue (I’m sure it’ll show up in the third though).

9. My basal body temperature was higher

I track my period using Natural Cycles (and I use it as a birth control/pregnancy planner). While I was not diligent for a few months (more to come on that later – there was a specific reason), once I knew I was pregnant, I took my temperature. Since I’ve been doing this since 2021, I knew what my “normal” temperature was. I was one full degree above that, daily. I’m still normally above that – around 98.2 (I’m typically at 97.1). That can be one, very early, indication of pregnancy!

10. Creativity has been flushed out of me

I’m a very creative person who will dedicate full days to just creating things. Unfortunately, this hit me early on and hasn’t seemed to really slow down. I think about having a journal day and I simply don’t want to. Ugh. It seems like so much work to try and create something when my body is already literally creating something. It’s like I don’t have the brain power to put the pieces together. I’m hoping this wears off or maybe once I go on maternity leave (pre-pregnancy!) and don’t have to work (ahhh stress), I might be able to get back into it. Crossing my fingers.

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All in all, my pregnancy hasn’t been too bad! I think the one thing that kills me the most is how tired I am because I know I don’t give myself very much grace. I give myself a hard time for not being able to do the simple things I used to be able to do. Things I could do while not pregnant. I am someone who can’t sit still very well. If I’m not cleaning or doing some task, I feel like I’m not being productive and if I’m not being productive, what good am I? I have a very hard time relaxing unless forced. And by forced, I mean you pretty much have to put me next to a body of water (beach, lake, river, pool – I’m not picky) with a book and give me your mean voice and say “Sit! Stay!” and then I can relax (please feed me). Otherwise? Nope. If I’m at home, it’s hard to relax. This is why we just booked a long weekend at a hotel a few hours away where I will sit and stay next to a pool and just let my brain dribble out of my ears because if we don’t, I might actually combust.