Let’s get this out of the way. Everything you learned about Thanksgiving is wrong. Which is actually true about most American holidays. If you’re over the age of 15 and are learning this for the first time, please call your parents and tell them that they failed. No seriously. Google “The Dark History of Thanksgiving” for me. When you’re done, you can come back. It’s a terrible holiday. And, in the true American way, we celebrate by almost actually killing ourselves and others the day after so we can buy discounted shit (that we don’t need) from corporations who not only don’t care about you (the customer) but care even less about their own employees.
Aren’t holidays fun?
Cool… Let’s talk about food. The only reason I “celebrate” Thanksgiving is because I love to eat. Shove it in my face. I want to die in a Thanksgiving Meal Coma. Another great thing is actually slowing down and remembering what you’re thankful for this past year. That’s so important. 2002 has been a hell of a year on all of us. For me, personally, I’ve had so many amazing things happen and I’m constantly thanking the universe for getting me to this place. Remember to slow down and count all your blessings.
Also, please don’t participate in any Black Friday shit. Please don’t. Support small businesses as much as humanly possible.
Who doesn’t love potatoes? Granted, my favorite form of potato is fries, creamy mashed potatoes is a very close second. Because I’ve tried every diet known to man, there was a time where I didn’t eat potatoes and it was a very sad time in my life. I personally am a fan of peeled and creamy CREAMY garlicky mashed potatoes (but I’m okay with the more rustic version). The only time I won’t eat them is when they are SUPER dry and crumbly. You have to cream them people!
STUFFING. This is number one in my book. I could honestly eat just this and be almost completely happy. I still don’t really understand what it is that makes it so freaking delicious but there’s something that hits the spot. The best version is boxed. 100%. Don’t try to make your own, use the goddamn box because nothing is better.
I know that I said I’m not a huge turkey fan but when you slice into the turkey and then grab some (homemade – not a can fan here) cranberry sauce, it’s the perfect bite. I love ordering Turkey Sandwiches with cranberry sauce on it because there’s not a more perfect sandwich combo. I’ve also been known to mix my cranberry sauce into my stuffing (which is also tasty).
I will eat pumpkin pie all year round (which my dad hates because I force him to make it for all the occasions). It’s simply the best. One year, I wanted to be ~fancy~ and make it from SCRATCH. Let me tell you… Canned pumpkin pie is the best because it tastes just like it did when I made it from scratch it just took a million less hours. Throw on some fresh, homemade whipped cream and I’m in heaven. Also, don’t try to trick me with sweet potato pie, I will punch you.
Butternut squash soup
I think around 2007-2009, my dad was really sick and tired of cooking Thanksgiving meals. My mom wasn’t much of a cook back then so it really fell on him. My mom’s family (who I grew up around) weren’t really cooks either so… Yeah. Dad cooked everything! One year, he said he wouldn’t do it anymore. He was sick of it. So I compromised with him. He would make the turkey and he could supervise me and my cousin making everything else! It was DELICIOUS. We kept to all his main go tos but I insisted on a Butternut Squash soup of my own making. It was a smash. I love soups, in general, but the creaminess and sweetness of this one is something else.
There you have it. My TOP traditional Thanksgiving things. I also really love brussel sprouts cooked with bacon, corn bread, and mulled wine. Green bean casserole and yams are both disgusting and should be thrown in the trash (I said what I said).
What’s your favorite dish at Thanksgiving?